


Forsaken

by NCISVILLE



Category: Victoria (TV)
Genre: 1x02 scene fix, F/M, First Kiss, do you really mean to forsake me?, ladies in waiting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-19
Updated: 2016-09-19
Packaged: 2018-08-15 22:37:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,432
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8075539
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NCISVILLE/pseuds/NCISVILLE
Summary: “Do you really mean to forsake me?” He should let her leave, give her time to mourn but instead he looked to Emma and pleaded for a moment alone before he took off running after her. It was improper he knew to be chasing after her but something within was bidding him to follow after her, to try and fix things. 1x02 scene fix aka the one where Melbourne doesn't leave her.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you all so much for the encouragement to keep writing for our amazing and doomed ship. I have received so many kind words and I thank you from the bottom of my heart. Keep leaving those comments!

Forsaken

 

The vote had finally come back after hours of vicious debate on the morals and principals the nation was founded on. The bill had passed minutely in their favour. Five votes. That is how close he came to a sudden shift in government. How could he lead with the confidence of the Whigs if he now no longer had such confidence in himself? His heart plummeted upon realization of what that meant. If…If he no longer lead government…he would no longer be Victoria’s Prime Minister. No more Victoria. No more riding out, dinners, card games, piano recitals, nothing. His light would be snuffed out, like a flame blown out all too eagerly by a young boy on his birthday. His heart began to ache, his eyes downcast, and mood crestfallen. How would he tell her? How would he live without her? She gave him purpose, a reason to live again and all too soon it would be taken from him. He would be left alone once more. 

His mind was numb on the ride back over to Buckingham. The dark of the night adequately reflected his mood, even the moon was hidden from sight tonight. He swallowed hard, but the lump in his throat would not leave. His mind and heart were so heavy even his steps became loud and hard pressed into the dirt. The only relief from the torment of his mind came when he saw how happy his Queen was to see him. He chided himself for thinking so possessively of her, as soon he would not have the smallest interaction with her. His heart sunk again but her smile was welcome after the long day he’d had at the house. She was jubilant to see him and something about that warmed his heart. 

“Lord M! The others had given you up but I knew you would come.” 

She was a wonder for his tired eyes and soul and her excitement at seeing him would all too soon come crashing down around them. A pang echoed in his heart and he tried to swallow the lump again but it budged not. 

“I must show you the painting I did of Dash. I got him to sit still for just long enough.” 

He laughed despite himself, imagining her trying to wrestle with the lapdog to keep him still enough to capture. “That’s a feat in itself.” He struggled internally with the words to speak to her, and stumbled through the first few. “I…I must tell you…ma’am…” He huffed out a breath trying to speak despite the pain in his heart and the lump in his throat that threatened to spill over his eyes. “The Jamaica bill passed by only five votes this evening.” Staring into her eyes he had to swallow again, his voice sounding even more uncertain to his own ears. “And that means I can no longer lead the Whigs in government.”

“But if the bill passed why should you resign?” She had a smile on her face but he could see inside she was confused and trying to refute his words, deny his impending leave from her side. 

“The Tories are like hyenas ma’am, once they scent a man is down they circle looking for weaknesses. The next vote we would certainly lose; I would rather leave now.” 

He watched her eyes once set in denial now become glassy with unshed tears and the very sight made his own eyes begin to burn. 

“This cannot be, how can I…how will I…” She looked away, and he watched her swallow hard, try to swallow the emotions that were raging to the surface. He knew that all too familiarly as he too felt it in that moment. He tried to drink her in, imprint her face in his mind but when she spoke again his heart shattered. “Do you really mean to forsake me?” 

His own eyes became glassy and his voice cracked as he replied, “I do not wish to leave you but…I have no choice ma’am.” He saw a single tear drop before she ran away, too overwhelmed to face him. She was leaving him before he had the chance to leave her. 

He should let her leave, give her time to mourn but instead he looked to Emma and pleaded for a moment alone before he took off running after her. It was improper he knew to be chasing after her but something within was bidding him to follow after her, to try and fix things. The servants would think him mad, the other Lords besotted, and himself…guilty. He found her crying in the sitting room and approached slowly, her back to him. Her small frame was shaking and her sobs went straight to his heart. He stopped in his tracks, suddenly realizing he did not know what to say. He wished to hold her and let her cry in his arms but only her husband should have that kind of intimacy with her. He watched her fall to the ground in front of the window, her sobs louder, body shaking more violently and he dismissed all thoughts of propriety and civility. Walking over he knelt on the ground beside her and put a hand on her shoulder. She looked up, sobs subsiding for a moment until she saw him. His eyes echoed the pain in her heart. Taking her hand off the ground he gave it a small squeeze and she broke down again this time throwing herself into his arms. He held her firmly against his chest and let her cry, his own tears falling down his face, heart breaking with hers. 

“Don’t leave. Please, please Lord M.” She begged, all sense gone. 

“I don’t see how I can stay ma’am.”

“You said I gave you a reason to continue as Prime Minister, is that no longer true?” She asked looking up from his chest. 

“I-”

“Is it?” 

“It is ma’am, but-”

“Then why are you giving up and not staying to fight? Nothing has happened requiring you to resign. You are allowing fear to rule your actions.” 

Her words resonated within him and he looked out the window ashamed to say anything. 

“I need you Lord M, I…I don’t know how to do this without you.” 

“Oh you don’t need me to be Queen. You do quite well without me.” 

“I do need you. You are the only one who understands me.” 

He tilted her chin up with a finger to meet his eyes and sucked in a breath at the realization of how close they were. Their breaths were intermingling; he could feel the faint thump of her heart against his even through the layers as she was so firmly pressed against him. They remained silent as they gazed into the other’s eyes, the only sound in the room their shallow breathing as they continued to look at one another. The atmosphere shifted, desire now evident in their eyes, tension thickly laced in the gentlest of touches. 

Something in his brain shut off, driven purely by deep desire and affections. Slowly he leaned closer to her, inch by inch until their lips were touching in a soft caress. There was such light pressure he wasn’t sure if he was imagining it all. She increased the pressure of her lips on his and he felt something spark within. It was something he hadn’t felt since his wedding day…love. Her kiss was awakening within feelings that had been dormant since the day his wife left followed shortly by the death of his son. Victoria was re-invigorating him with life, giving him a reason to fight, a reason to live not just a reason to be Prime Minister. 

Victoria pulled her lips back from his inhaling a deep breath, he could see stars in her eyes as she looked up to him in awe. He felt the loss of her lips and wished to kiss her again. He knew there was only one thing he could say in this moment. 

“I’ll stay. I’ll fight.” 

A smile stretched her lips and she crashed them against his own again that had begun to mimic her smile. He felt her laugh as she kissed him, tears and sorrow now pushed to the recesses of her mind. He knew they would have to talk and discuss the change in relationship between them, but that could come later. She was happy and he was going to stay, and really…that was all that mattered, the rest would fall into place.


End file.
